Sunday, October 10, 2010

When HE speaks!!!

Have you felt anxious for anything recently? Well….I did it! So, I am going to share what happened to me to encourage your soul and also I could not sleep after I fed my baby (at 4am) to 5am until I lifted from my bed to write this testimony.

Very recently me and my husband decided that I should quit my job (which served us very well) to stay home to take care of our baby Gabriela, so I left for maternity leave on June 18th and had Gabriela on July 16th, 2010 and did not return to work. We kept some good savings in order for us to be able to pay the hospital bills and survive well for a while. Of course we knew we would have some restrictions financially after that, but we trusted God anyways. But money does not last forever and when the savings started going really down, my heart started feeling a little anxious. I do not know if I would feel the same without having a baby, but since I had Gabriela it seems that I have more “worries and fears” (which are not from the Lord either) than before when it was only me and my husband. Anyways, this anxiety started making me feel so bad in my soul, a feeling that I was not trusting the Lord as I was supposed to. I started thinking from going to the Laundromat to wash people’s clothes to coming back to my previous open door job again and putting Gabriela on the day care (not that I have anything against who does that, of course not and I understand whoever does it), but this thought was going against what I wanted. So, I thought about giving classes online, selling clothes, perfumes, working in the mall, all sorts of things and jobs you can think of I could do either from home or in the evenings and I applied for many too. But still I knew my heart was not resting as it was supposed to and normally did, and every time I looked at Gabriela on the sofa, in her sleep, sucking her pacifier, smiling so beautifully, relaxing and nothing seemed to bother her, I used to think to myself: “This is how I want to be too” and then this passage always used to come to me:

Matthew 18:1-5

At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them,and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.

So, I decided to do what is best for any person to do when anxiety knocks on the door and you let it in: Prayer Closet!

Matthew 6:5-6

"And when you pray, you shall not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the corners of the streets, that they may be seen by men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly".

1 John 5:15

And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him.

Well….I had a wonderful prayer time and I confessed I was like that, asked for forgiveness and asked the Father to give me a word, and these were the words He gave me:

Isaiah 55:8-9

“ For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the LORD. “ For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.

Wow….these words really blew me away!! The Lord was telling me that all the thoughts I had about the circumstance I was in were all different from His and that they were all lower and not reaching His thoughts to my life, that His ways were higher than the ways I was thinking to give to my situation. I praised and praise His Holy name! What a wonderful Father we have!

Then, this was the other word linking to the word He had given me before in Isaiah:

Jeremiah 29: 11-12

 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you.

Wow and wow again…. For He said He had thoughts of peace for me, not anxieties ….and He was thinking about my future much more than I was and He was giving me hope and I was just supposed to be praying to Him, calling His name and He would listen to me…. Every Scripture is good for comforting! Praise His majestic name!

So, I would like to encourage each one of you that is in a very difficult situation today and finding yourself a little anxious of what to eat, what to drink, what to wear, how to get out of this circumstance, what to do, what the next step is……Go to the Prayer Closet and pour out your heart to the Lord in sincerity and be very honest about what you are feeling in your heart and TRUST Him that He is in control of everything and very very soon you will be laughing about the situation and saying: “Another time the Lord surprised me with His blessings and His ways and thoughts to me”!

Be blessed and Be encouraged for the Lord knows what to do and when to do it! Hopefully this sharing may lift your soul to exalt His Holy name.

May His grace and favor be upon the obedient ones always,

Much love,

Cynthia R. Palmer